The Innocence of a First Kiss
With my history of first dates underlined with undressed figures and endless desires, I lost the innocence of a first kiss. Noah would often ask if I kissed the man I was on a date with during our debriefing sessions, and I thought it was a silly question; the better question lied in whether I had slept with them or not. It was a title I forced upon myself, but it’s hard to shed when you forge it as part of your own dating construct. Sex, intimacy, and desire are all wonderful powers that I will not deny to want frequent, in precedence, and with poor patience, but beneath it all is a lingering tale of a hopeless romantic losing hopefulness for a will to withstand the temptation for a short while. The lust that grows and respect that flourishes when exploring the depths of someone’s mind is deep down all I have sought. At the core of it all, I never strayed from that mentality, but allowed myself to decay from that person to fulfill short-term fires and quiet the voce in my head that screamed you need to prove yourself first otherwise he won’t be around for a long while. He made me feel like that girl again, the girl I wanted to be again.
Harvey turned to me as we stopped and waited for the street light to change, his arms graciously grasping my waist and guiding my quivering lips. Instantly calmed and roused as a simultaneous pair, his lips continued to meet mine for the passing of two lights.
“We missed our turn to cross.” Harvey laughed as the light changed man to hand yet again.
“I don’t give a damn.” I grinned, pulling his face to mine.
A man passed by and smiled at the two of us being that couple, even on our first date; the one that others eye with envy eyes. Hand in hand, grin plastered and forever plasticized on our faces, the feeling possessing our bones bled through the streets like the wintery spread. I was uplifted by a feeling that was undeniable. So, I wore my heart as my skin and continued down that road to an unknown. The smile on his lips, wrinkles on his cheeks, and the fire in his eyes never left for a moment we were together.