The Importance of What is Important
Lately, I have had a lot of thoughts about what it means to really live.
Plagued with the idea that at a certain age we should be married, followed with kids, and somewhere, preferably before, be in possession of a home, our lives seem like a poorly written sitcom with no other end result except for what you can expect. I've flipped between wanting and absolutely detesting the idea of kids and have fallen somewhere in the realms of "I don't think that's for me". Knowing that at the prime age in my mid-thirties I will tactfully decline the role and responsibility of a mother leaves a whole window of opportunity for what I want. Only blank space ahead, I know there are goals that I want to accomplish but I've only ever stretched for the makings of the dream and kept the actual dream catching for a later time. There's always tomorrow or in a year and that's not something I can achieve now were and still are ideas that seep into my mind to keep me comfortable.
After meeting goals I've never felt like what I've accomplished is enough. I thought it was a part of myself that I needed to improve in order to find my happiness, but maybe it is my inner workings knowing that I want more. It's a push away from the plan of a life I had drawn out in my head that I was seemingly longing for. We often write a list that says "Before I die, I want to..." with a string of ideas of what will make us happy. But providing a lifetime means, if you're like me, that procrastinating those things you seek is okay as long as they get done before the end. I continue to wait for life to happen, for some change to occur that I believe is out of my control and transpires from the passing of time, to reach what I think I want before I die.
Making that list expire in a time that is less than far away, I've come to terms with what I'm actually willing to put the effort in for. When you push everything else away and ask yourself "What do you really want today?", what are you left with?
All of this has made me think about the importance of what is important in my life and question whether something I want is because of societal pressures or a disillusioned fantasy or because it's a deep desire. Even if you want kids, stopping for a moment and thinking about what you would want to accomplish without them might bring a revelation for how you are living. I know it was for me.
If you have never checked them out before, Yes Theory encompasses this idea into videos better than I could ever verbalize. Their simple idea of "Seek Discomfort" has resonated with in my life and pushed me to search for something more in life.
Even if it is small, take the moment today to realize that you are in full control of your life and it doesn't have to be told as a tale that someone would expect.