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The 27 of 2017: Skipping Ahead Continued

The 27 of 2017: Skipping Ahead Continued

The summer was a mesh of moments like this. The nights spent going out with friends, drinks and dancing, ending the night hand in hand in an Uber. Pretty much every meal spent watching him cook while I gave my encouragement from next to the fan in the sweltering kitchen. The look he gave me before he would leave for work in the morning, lingering for that extra moment. He was the first and only guy to meet Noah.

The night they met was probably the most drunk I had been in a while. He blacked out after a bottle of Jamieson and neither of us noticed. He was very happy and agreeable drunk who came along to our favourite gay club in the village to dance. I don’t think I have to paint a picture of how the evening went.   

“I like you.” Andrew said to me as we crawled into bed after the night out.

“I like you too, Andrew.” I responded with a smile and a kiss.

“I really like you.” He slurred.

“Haha. Me too.” I said pressing myself up against his chest and squeezing his muscular arms. I closed my eyes and breathed in his intoxicating cologne that had yet to wear off.

“I miss you.”

“Andrew. I’m right here.” I laughed with not a single part of my body an inch away from his.

“When you’re not around.” He said softly.

“Andrew.” I giggled realizing how drunk he was. “I miss you too.”

My voice trailed off as I fell asleep on his chest with a smile carved onto my face for the rest of the night.

“Did we end up going out last night?” Andrew said as he woke.

“You’re kidding right?”

“No. Seriously.”

“You want to hear what you said to me last night?”

“Oh no.” He groaned.

I keeled over laughing and teased him about the night for the weeks that followed. That summer was filled with so much more than I expected.

“It was also filled with empty promises.” I said.

“What did he promise you?” Dr. Brooks asked.

“That he wouldn’t let me be the one that got away. That he would come back for me. That he would call me every week. That giving me his sweater before he left actually meant he would hold onto the idea of us. The “me too” he replied when I said I was going to fall in love with him at this rate.” I looked up at Dr. Brooks. “He has already settled down with someone new. Guess it doesn’t really matter much anymore.”

That last night we were together before he left, we had sex one final time. I could feel myself distancing myself from him and he was doing the same. I don't blame him for that. I understand it. But I don't understand this. And in the five minutes before he left, he pulled out his phone.

“This girl messaged me on tinder saying this.” He said, showing me the message.

I’m not sure what the message said. I held myself together and acted like one of the bros he was making me to be. We said our goodbyes and I gave him a last kiss with an empty look in my eyes.

“Come here you.” He said pulling me close and kissing my forehead.

 I don’t think he noticed. I called Noah after and broke down in tears.

The 27 of 2017: The Final Peek

The 27 of 2017: The Final Peek

Fuel Your Compass

Fuel Your Compass