Hopeless Romantic at Heart
To all the hopeless romantics out there, this one is for you.
Even after all the heartbreaks, disappointments, and unexplored avenues, I still believe in the goodness of love. I believe in it every time I go to a wedding and feel its presence and happiness all around. I believe in it when I see an elderly couple holding hands along the street. I believe in it when I feel the world blurring around me when I'm with someone. Sometimes in the pressures and flux of dating, I forget its purpose. I'm not just after great sex but you better damn believe that I want it. But I want more - so much so that I had to tattooed onto my skin. I want more in life and more in love and I still believe its out there. I'm not a patient person and with too many first dates gone awry, the purpose of this whole online dating world sometimes becomes unclear.
Guy after guy, date after date, I struggle to believe that there is something more out there waiting. But then I think back to that date after heartbreak. It was far too soon after but it turned into a whirlwind summer of some of my favourite memories. I remember my faith being restored as he turned back after I called out his name. I remember my faith being restored after smiling like an idiot in public to a cute message. I remember my faith being restored the moment I was at my childhood friend's wedding in the summer. Their pure, selfless, and endearing companionship, in a time that I had to say goodbye to someone far too soon, brought tears to my eyes and reminded me of all the wonderful connections and memories I made along the way.
Maybe I'll have to sift through a lot more pain and short-lived memories to find something lasting. Maybe it won't happen for years to come. Maybe it'll never be lasting. But I know that when I find it, regardless of circumstances and life spiraling around, I will always choose to follow my heart.